its all different

in about 32 hours i will finish my last exam. i dont know if the feelings quite hit me. that there will be no going back to college, after 'summer holidays' end. thats after june, life is going to be all very different. that everyone will go their own way and from here on the trips really what i make of it for myself. no more autocratic educationists going after me to make me attend class, no more exams to prove how much i listen or dont listen in class, no more mindless activities that i will be coerced into doing, no more being addressed at 1959.

its going to be real tests, with real consequences from now on. real tasks that will get me somewhere, and i will be accountable for the actions i take. i will be called revati, i will wear what i want and hopefully not feel gloomy when i walk in to the gates of office everyday. it will be exciting and productive. i will spend more time not sleeping. its all very exciting and i hope it lives up to my expectations.

the vela creature that i am, im quite sure if i end up having fun, i will never want to go back to studying and going back to do that masters program. but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. right now im thinking about finding my way to the jungle, since the beach is too far away..

the weather is just brilliant outside. i want to take a walk. there was some talk of going away to bandipur for a day or two, but we need a car to get there [!!]. except for that im all ready to take myself and my back pack to the jungle, to tusker trail where the food is simple and the beds and bathrooms clean, and the safari is way better than the government service, and see the deer and the elephants and the rain and the water holes and the lush forest that looks so bright and pure and clean after he rain has fallen. sigh. now if only that car problem worked out, i could be there. im just that close.