Saturday, September 29, 2007

you gotto take your time

when happiness comes, it comes in heaps and bunches.

iv got to stop worrying about things that i cannot change. iv got to let go of things i cant do anything about.

when i do, things are just so blissed out.

its been an awesome week. in a lot of ways.


Wednesday, September 26, 2007


niyu left for bombay today.
i miss her.
i just got home and into my bedroom.
her stuff is all gone.
the room feels so goddamn empty.
i will sleep alone tonight.
there will be not chitter chatter.
there will be no laughter in the darkness.
there will be no half asleep discussion.
there will be no bickering.
and i feel all weird and uncozy in here.


Sunday, September 23, 2007

f 8, surprise party

new additions to the playlist on my phone:

i belong to you - lenny kravitz
take five - dave brubeck quartet
freedom - george michael
too funky - george michael
spinning the wheel - george michael
guitar man - bread
sail away with me - george michael
chan chan - ibrahim ferrer (buena vista social club)

killer stuff. aftereffects of last night. niyu turned 18 and james and i threw her what was meant tobe a kickass surprise party. it was a huge surprise, because she was thoroughly shocked. but it wasnt as kickass as id have liked it to be. people can be such ditchers! empty house, 50+ beers in a bucket full of ice, coke, sprite, biryani, kababs, fried rice and roomali roti rolls and 2 huge sinful chocolate cakes. and we entertained only about 12 people. what started as a list of 30 came down to 12. but id say i had fun. it was a joyand a complete blast putting it together. orchestrating the surprise. planning the food and drinks with james and pulling it off. i wouldnt have been able to do it alone. james was my faithful partner in crime all along. and i cannot tell you just how thankful i am for it. he's so organised and so calm and so proper about everything, it was just such a pleasure.

from making excel sheets with lists and buying the stuff and decorating the house and getting the surprise on the road, we did it all together. pictures will follow. (shilo, where art thou?!)

the music is part of the post party hangover / high..and im not down on one knee, but the music is really getting under my skin.

im super tired. its been a weird day. lying in bed hasnt felt this good in days..

Friday, September 21, 2007

the cloud of promise

i loved this. goosebumps and all.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

nothing worse??

theres nothing worse than wanting something so bad and not having it
theres nothing worse than feeling like something you want is out of your reach
theres nothing worse than having a mindblock when you need to be flowing with ideas
theres nothing worse than a scattered mind when you so need to focus
theres nothing worse than an itch you cant scratch

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

haffy burday

someones turning 23 tomorrow.
someones entering my side of the fence.
someones growing on me day after day.
someones gnawing his way deeper into my heart.
someones going to be a 23 year old happy puppy baby tomorrow.


happy birthday in advance.

Monday, September 17, 2007

shine alertu!

friday morning traffic jam entertainment

strange names

Vivek says:
stupid wevu

Saturday, September 15, 2007

new blogs!

aunty mia and crazy uncle bubba have their own blogs now.. read more at.. for some untterly real, yet hilariously satyrical and just so-much-fun-to-read real life anecdotes..

and for some downright zany writing that presents a fresh new look at current events and world news. yeahwww hawhaw!

you have to check it out!

Friday, September 14, 2007


events in my life have a funny way of going through phases where evevrything is so extreme. one aspect is so great while another, hidden from most others, is so diametrically opposite from everything else.

all and nothing.
black and white.
yes and no.
accept and reject.
give and take.

and theres no in betweens.
i want a little bit of everything.
i want the greys.
i want the maybes.
i want the pleasantries.
i want to make peaceful choices.

theres all this surface edginess but inside im unperturbed. perhaps its a sign that there really is nothing to worry about, and things will fall into place.
im sending out some good juju much like maddy did a few weeks ago. theres just too much negativity doing the rounds.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

cold cold cold

misunderstood feelings
mistaken feelings
confused feelings
mixed up feelings

Friday, September 07, 2007

the ones we love..

..are the ones we're most hurt by
..are the ones we unconsciously hurt
..are the ones we inevitably turn to
..are the ones we think make us complete
..are the ones we hope will stand by us
..are the ones we take most for granted
..are the ones we need and cherish
..are the ones we think we can accept with all their imperfections

the only people who truly, selflessly and purely manage to pull all of this off are our parents. who accept us with our differences and generational idiosyncrasies and have an unwavering love for us and want only the best for us.

why do we run away from things we have? and chase after things we cannot have?

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

in continuation..

ristey to nahi rishton ki parchaayiyaan miley
yeh kaisi bheed bas yahan tanhaayiyaan miley

only shadows.
a glimmer of togetherness and support.
and we're all fooled.
in a crowd of so many hundreds and still so alone.


i really need to meet a new set of people. i feel saturated.

its ironic..the people i wish were in my life dont want to be around. everything is so superficial it makes me sick. big talk, no shit. iv seen it too many times not to notice when it comes around again.

its always end up wanting whats not going to work and what going towards doom.

its enjoy not being connected to the world when your phone dies at you.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

too much and too little

new job, new scene, new atmosphere
things dont gel immediately
sometimes they dont gel even 2 weeks later
sometimes you need to backtrack and redo things
new job, apprehensions, questions
money over work? work over money?
my cell phone is fucked
bangalore is a sleepy city
incompetent useless place this is
people are undependable
friends dont stay, friends disappear
boys suck. boys are uncaring, boys are not worth it, boys are so selfish
james is a lifesaver sometimes
beer buzz is a good feeling
im sleepy
photography is a new found interest is whats keeping me occupied these days
next week things may be all new again
and all i crave is some familiarity
nothing feels the same anymore
work, friends, people i know, family, passion, love, familiarity.. its all changed