Wednesday, July 28, 2010

contentment: an update of sorts

the days have been spinning around, in a way where you dont know when one day ended and the next began. its good, i guess. because it now seems like life is falling into place. the "goan honeymoon" so to speak is over, and LIFE has begun. not to say things arent as much fun any more, but i think what i needed was this routine. a balance between work and home and other things that need to get done. and the fact that i need to find a balance obviously means i have enough on my hands. so yes, thats whats kept me busy and away from the blog.

in the weeks that have passed, iv wanted to blog so often. thoughts occurred. feelings overwhelmed me. funny incidents begged to be recorded. random conclusions that ought to have been penned down, didnt. its only because iv been juggling around a fair bit of work, without compromising on my chores and the few things i like to do well around the house. which is basically: cooking, tidying up and making sure things are dust-free, in their place and easy to access. and since i can get quite obsessive and freaky about that, it does in fact take up a lot of my time and energy.

so, whats been up?
1) im currently sharing my time between 2 equally interesting and time consuming assignments. i feel lucky that i now have my hands full and im short of time, because 2 months ago when i had close to no work, i really did almost get to the point where i thought maybe the work thing is over for now, and i must commit to just being a full time housewife. but no, life has proven me wrong again! it seems im worth more!

2) this business of being a stay at home wife, and continuing to pursue a satisfying and challenging "career" is kind of difficult. and my respect for those who do it effortlessly has grown. those who do it with kids to manage, HATS OFF! i find that on most days even though im at home and have to just move between the table where i work and the kitchen where i cook, im RUNNING. i dont walk, because i feel il waste time. i RUN! its get a bit crazy sometimes :)

3) i travelled twice this month. to bangalore in the beginning of the month, and to bombay this weekend that just passed. bangalore was about meeting both sets of parents and the family, and bombay was about celebrating my grand mothers 75th, and celebrating the life of my grand father on the 6 month mark since he left us. the last weekend was an emotional roller-coaster ride. oscillating between feeling extreme joy at how strong and inspiring my grand mother is, and feeling the emotional punch of being in that very home without my grandfather around was tough. i might not have shown it much, but deep down something was constantly tugging at my heart. a vacuum, so to speak. a reminder that something is missing and that things are not the same. but it was a good break: lots of family time (and i mean uncles, aunts, cousins, the works!), i got to wear a sari after like 6 months, i got to meet my folks and priya, i even scoped out some prospective work for myself!

4) iv been cooking and experimenting a fair bit. and pretty much all my experiments have been successful. which has resulted in significant growth of my repertoire, and and a boost in my confidence. i am now contemplating inviting people over and cooking for them -- something i was too afraid to do so far. whats new on my list? paranthas, kheema, malabar chicken curry, pakodas, caramel custard..yes, i know a few simple things, but this is a big step up for me.

5) in other news, i have begun to seriously dislike the smell of smoke. the husband is a smoker, and while i have given up on him ever giving up, im tormented by thoughts of how im going to manage to continue to exist as a passive smoker, given that my tolerance for smoke is diminishing at an alarming space. its reached a point where i need to get up, leave the room and get some fresh air as soon as someone lights up. the smell of smoke is now stifling and chokes me in no time. this is something that never happened before. so help me god.

6) it rained like NOBODYS BUSINESS in july. the longest and hardest spell i have ever witnessed in my life was 10 days at a stretch. i guess THIS is what monsoon in a coastal place is like. iv thoroughly enjoyed it, everything is so lush and green and cleansed out. iv seen the clouds, the sky and the rain do things i didnt know they could! but frankly, i think i need to see the sun. please mr. sunshine, i need to see your face again. just long enough for my laundry to dry as quickly as it used to. just long enough so my pillows dont get mouldy again. just long enough that my house doesnt smell musty from keeping all the windows closed. (i know that once the monsoon is well and truly over, and the POST-monsoon heat begins, im going to regret having asked mr. sunshine to kindly make an appearance)

7) the husband and i got to be "models" in a short stop-motion ad film! more about that once i find out where and when it will be up.

8) my folks have been pretending to come visit me for so long now. it seems, FINALLY, theyre going to be here sometime next month. and though im still a few weeks away from it and ANYTHING could happen in the interim, im bursting with excitement already.

9) OH OH OH, i got a haircut! and i mean a real haircut, for a change. not a trim, not something more than a trim. i mean an all new look. and after a gap of about 10-12 (or maybe more) years, i decided to go short again. no ponytails, no clips, no maintenance. wash, comb, wear. and i love it. personally, i think it just makes me look my age :)

10) we've discovered a fair bit of new eat outs in goa, so that list has grown too. we now have variety -- from street stall food (beef croquettes and pav, shawarma rolls, etc) to the best continental food iv ever had in goa! yayy to more variety and more choice, that came at just the right time in my life.

so, thats that i think. excuse me while i go back to work. yes, in my bean bag which has been strategically placed to look outside the balcony. ah, this life. at this point, i really couldnt ask for more. i think if contentment is a feeling, this would be it.


VC said...

:) hey u can see/download the video here

Shruthi said...

1) I LOVED this post
2) That's a cool ad, and you look very sweet.
3) I want to see pics of you after your haircut.

hAAthi said...

vc: thanks for the link da :P

1) glad you liked the update..its someitmes the best way to get a lot of things off your mind in one go! otherwise i sometimes feel like i have a jumble of unwritten posts in my head and theyre all bursting out.
2) :P
3) arent we friends on fb? theres a picture up there!

Disguise said...

You've been cooking? TEACH ME ALSO! Travelling is awesome. And you're a stay at home wife? THAT IS SO COOOL.
HAIRCUTTT! I'm getting one soon :)

I love updates!

hAAthi said...

disguise: it wasnt THAT long, was it?