losing weight. the easy way.

8 p.m.
he (rubbing belly and limping around) - i feel really thin today
me - THIN?? you call that thin? let me burst your little illusion
he - *grins*
me - youre the exact opposite of thin at the moment

9:30 p.m.
me - will you have another bun with your soup and salad (diet food, fyi)
he - i might. maybe just another half. will you have the other half?
me - yeah, okay
he - LESS butter please
me - *drops jaw in shock* (because im not used to requests for LESS butter)

10 p.m.
me - heres your piece of dark chocolate
he - give me some more no? please?
me - more? but arent you on a diet?
he - yes but iv hurt my ankle and i need all the energy i can get
me - ohhh hahaha.. in that case i think il have a piece too
he - what about your diet?
me - yeah i know, but i don't want you to finish my share ok..it was my slab in the first place
(the whole time the slab is not BETWEEN us, but hidden out of my sight. i can only hear the wrapper crackling everytime a piece is consumed slyly)

10:05 p.m.
me - youre eating so much aa? maybe il have another bite
he - its over da :)

successfully consumed: one whole slab of bournville rich dark chocolate
diet quotient: 0 (on a scale of 1-10)
happiness levels: 10 (on a scale of 1-10)